Great Spank Debate... This can get touchy... so NO judgement..

I'm an anti spanker… I don't hit, or spank my kids… I wasn't spanked so it just has never occurred to me… and thankfully I've been able to discipline them without resorting… But I have MANY friends that threaten a spanking or pop their kids… I have to say, I have never EVER seen it work… Ever… But, I will never judge...

Thoughts? Spanking? Threatening spanking as a punishment?

Moms Expertise
I have never struck my kids... Ever. And my kids are really well behaved and respectful with manners... I mean, they're normal.. they can be jerks.. but, I get compliments all the time...I don't know that I can say, I KNOW THE WAY...

But you don't need to hit... All I have to do now is change my tone or look, or give the warning voice and they know, that that's the last line or S*** goes down fast... and by THAT I mean, They lose their tv time or xbox or swimming or legos or doll or whatever it is that they love the most that moment.. It's gone..

The best and hardest thing I ever did was when my son was 3 and he threw a sippy cup and I had asked him to pick it up and he did and threw it again.. I have him a warning, that he would lose his transformer toy if he did it again and HE did of course and I took it.
This was extreme for a 3 year old.. I did NOT give it back until the next day... he begged and pleaded and I said, "Nope. We have rules, you don't follow them, you lose a toy"... It was hard... But a few days later.. he looked like he was about to throw his cup and I said his name and warned him and he knew I would follow through.

That's what it is for me anyway... Follow through. I see friends and parents give out empty threats all day long, .. "if you don't listen we won't go to frozen yogurt".. but they end up going anyway... My own sister used to threaten no swimming to her kids and they RAN A SWIM School... ANd always gave in once the heated moment passed...

You need to follow through hard once or twice and if they know that your word is final, there shouldn't have to be any further punishment...

ALSO.. I feel like I enjoy my kids a lot.. we have fun together and I hope and like to think of myself as a fun mom... I'm silly and loving and we joke a lot... and see our friends a lot... SO, when I'm not fun mom... they don't like it. MY biggest punishment as a kid was when my mom was "disappointed" in me... Man, that sucked... She was a little cold and stand offish for a little while and I hated that...
    Brings up a good point... when does spanking become abuse? When it's used weekly? Daily? How hard? Is a spanking once a year abusive? For me... and this is FOR me... I'm actually fascinated by it all... To punish a child with physical pain... is wrong.. it's to show strength and bullying... To ME...

    Anyone see Monsters INC? Remember when Sully see's what Boo see's and how terrifying he looks? He's this sweet big guy and he looks mean and huge and ugly to her... and he felt sad... Thats' how I feel... Hitting my kids would be a forced will of power... My power. I'm the strongest...

    However... with that said... I don't have overly willful or difficult children... They are strong willed and tough and stubborn as all hell, but there isn't an acute situation... maybe I would think differently...
      I had a very firm mind set to not spanking my child before she was born. I always believed that when you hit a child it teaches them to hit. Went a very long time till one day I did spank her, I felt terrible but it worked so well I did it when I thought she needed it for doing something bad. Now though my thoughts in the beginning came true, I spanked her and she spanked me back! Big wake up call, so now I take her toys away and that works 90% of the time. I think that we use spanking as an easy way out type thought, and to do something else is work that a lot of people don't feel like dealing with.
      About Jessica
      Born: Novato, California
      Current: Sherman Oaks, California
      Birth: May 28
      On since: Aug 5, 2013
      We live in Los Angeles, CA. I'm a writer, comedian, actor and single mom of two. Parenting is hard. I try to keep a sense of humor about it all and find the find the funny... in what is most likely NOT funny (i.e. boogers, meltdowns, homework, etc.).